Mother told me this story about my sister, Buffie. When she was about twelve years old and mother was at a church meeting she decided to make some donuts. She gathered the ingredients, prepared the batter, cut out the donuts and cooked them in hot oil. The donuts were beautiful. The last step was to sprinkle them with sugar. Buffie was very proud of her efforts and finally took the first taste.
Her mouth started to pucker and she couldn't believe her taster. The donuts were completely loaded with salt. As she was preparing the batter she had reached into the cupboard and grabbed a quart bottle of what she thought was sugar. It was salt. She used the same bottle of sugar to sprinkle the donuts after they were cooked. It was still salt. She ruined the complete batch of donuts. She wanted to get some benefit from these ruined donuts so she threw them over the fence into the chicken yard. At least the chickens would enjoy them. Later that evening, when dad came home, he went out to do some evening chores and found all thirty-five of his chickens lying on their backs with their legs sticking in the air. They were dead. The salt had killed every one of his chickens.
Now for the rest of the story. Sixty-five years after the "salty donuts story", I received a call from my third daughter, Kathy. She was complaining because a neighbor from across the street was raising chickens. He would release these chickens from their pen each morning and they would eventually arrive in Kathy's yard, scratching and digging and spreading chicken manure. Kathy wanted to know if I had any suggestions on how to stop this problem. My reply was for her to talk to her husband. He was an attorney and should be able correct this situation. Kathy answered that he was far too busy to become involved in a "chicken-law suit. At that time I received some inspiration. Joan, my wife, said that the inspiration was from a tainted source. Never-the-less, I suggested that Kathy just make some donuts using salt rather than sugar and throw them out in her front yard.
Several weeks later I asked Kathy how she had solved her chicken problem. She replied, "I did what you recommended." I don't know what happened, but the chickens don't visit my yard anymore."
It is so satisfying when my wisdom, accumulated over eighty-some years, can help my children solve problems they face in their life. If any of the readers of this blog has a problem, I'll be happy to solve your problem provided the solution doesn't require money or effort.
Grandpa's Humor -
When I was younger and in better health I loved to play golf. One of the courses I played had a hole that required a wood shot over a lake. I had never been successful in keeping my ball out of the water. Therefore, I never used a new ball. Rather, I would use an old ball that had multiple slices and nicks.
One day when I reached this hole, I chose the usual old defaced ball and said a silent prayer. However, before I could hit, a powerful voice from above seemed to boom out from the clouds, saying, "WAIT, REPLACE THE OLD BALL WITH A BRAND NEW BALL. I did so and prepared to hit. But once again a voice came down saying: "WAIT, STEP BACK AND TAKE A PRACTICE SWING."
I did so and prepared to hit. Again a voice boomed saying, "TAKE ANOTHER PRACTICE SWING." I was excited because I felt that I would receive Heavenly help and be able to hit my ball onto the green. So I stepped back and took another practice swing. A long silence followed. Then the voice said: "USE THE OLD BALL.
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